


Your Joy Is My High

by ashkore_varg



Category: Suburra - La Serie | Suburra: Blood on Rome (TV)
Genre: Aureliano is also a very thirsty boi, Dorks in Love, Established Relationship, Kinda?, M/M, Porn With Plot, Spadeliano - Freeform, Spadino is the dancing king and Aureliano loves it, daje
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-24
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2020-01-31 05:55:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18585148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashkore_varg/pseuds/ashkore_varg
Summary: [...] “Prima o poi te devo portà a ballà.” (Sooner or later I'll have to take you out to dance.)Spadino told him one morning, as he sat perched on top of the bar with a cup of coffee in his hand, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. Aureliano looked up at him for a moment, soaking in the softness of his sleepy features and how pretty his red lips looked before even thinking about replying.“Seh, certo. Contace.” (Yeah right, you can count on it.) [...]





	Your Joy Is My High

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this one in English, both 'cause people asked and 'cause... Well I'm sorry, I can't bring myself to write smut in Italian. I just can't. Forgive me! LMAO
> 
> I couldn't believe the amount of positive response I got on my first fic about them, I was truly overwhelmed and I couldn't thank you all enough! 
> 
> I hope you guys will enjoy this one, too!

Imagine being told your entire life that you’re the reason why your mother died, that’s reason enough for your lips to never curl upwards, for your heart to rarely feel any joy.

Imagine being constantly harassed, beaten and pushed around by your father, for the sole reason that your existence bothers him.

Imagine holding the horrible weight of your family name on your shoulders and never being able to really make any meaningful connections, because nobody wants you around, or because everyone you care about eventually leaves or dies.

Aureliano has never smiled too often during his twenty five years on this earth. There just haven't been that many occasions that called for a smile, as he grew up.

That’s why there’s always a couple creases between his eyebrows, why they’re always sort of knitted together. There’s always either a stoic, unimpressed expression on his face, or a permanent frown that actually made his brow ache from time to time.

Life had thrown him some really awful curveballs, but in the midst of all that shit, Aureliano had been presented with the greatest gift of all:  _ love _ .

Mind you, not the easy kind that makes your stomach flutter and your heart skip a beat, but the kind of love that tears through your very soul and flips your world upside down. The kind of love that challenges you, changes you and turns you into a better person if you are brave enough to allow it to do so.

Spadino was his hurricane love. He came into his life through a series of casualties as an enemy, and they'd found themselves bound together by a fate so much bigger than them in a matter of weeks. Aureliano had to question everything he'd always known, he had dared to defy everything that his family had always stood by because of how much he loved Spadino.

Spadino who made him realize that maybe gypsies weren't that bad, after all. Spadino that always made fun of his scowl. Spadino that had spared his life when he killed his cousin. Spadino whom he had killed for. Spadino who was there for him when no one else was. Spadino who would drop anything he was doing to run to him in a heartbeat. Spadino who kept on loving him even after he had rejected him in the worst of ways.

Spadino was his happiness. No one and nothing could make him smile and laugh harder than him. Especially when Spadino did one of the things he loved doing the most:  _ dance _ .

He could dance anywhere at anytime, with or without music, and in a way that Aureliano definitely had never seen before. It was Spadino’s personal style, and Aureliano loved it. He could stare at him and his silly looking moves for hours and have a permanent smile on his face the entire time.

They'd been dating for a couple months, now, they had been trying to spend as much time together as it was possible, it wasn’t easy with Angelica being pregnant and Spadino being in charge of his family. Still… They wanted to make it work. So Spadino would make excuses about having work to do at night, and he’d stay at the old Adami hotel at least three times a week.

Aureliano was getting used to seeing Spadino dance through the hallways, clapping his hands, stomping and spinning around as he shuffled from one room to the other. Nadia would playfully join him at times, and then they'd relentlessly try to get Aureliano to dance with them, but to no avail.

He wasn't a dancer, he'd never been, not even as a teenager when all of his peers would go to the club on Saturday night. If he entered a club on the weekend, it was usually to sell pills and cocaine, certainly not to sway and bounce to the hammering rhythm of those noisy EDM songs.

“Prima o poi te devo portà a ballà.”  _ (Sooner or later I'll have to take you out to dance.) _

Spadino told him one morning, as he sat perched on top of the bar with a cup of coffee in his hand, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. Aureliano looked up at him for a moment, soaking in the softness of his sleepy features and how pretty his red lips looked before even thinking about replying.

“Seh, certo. Contace.”  _ (Yeah right, you can count on it.) _

Aureliano replied sarcastic, quickly going back to the newspaper he'd been reading while drinking coffee. He’d never been a newspaper kind of guy, but the recent political developments called for it.

“C’hai ragione… N’ sia mai te diverti…”  _ (You're right, you might accidentally have some fun…) _

Spadino teased, and Aureliano had to raise his eyebrows and shoot him a pointed look.

“Perché, n’ te sei divertito l'altra sera?”  _ (Why, you didn't have fun last night?) _

He asked, suddenly a mischievous smirk stretching his lips at the memories from the night before. Aureliano had surprised him with dinner in bed - pizza and cold beer - then they'd made love for hours.

He watched Spadino’s cheeks flush a deep shade of pink, and sheepishly stare down at his cup of coffee. They may have been dating for a while now, but Aureliano could still make him blush like the first time, and it was something he could never get tired of.

“Scemo, certo che me so’ divertito…”  _ (Of course I had fun, you idiot…)  _ Spadino muttered, still not looking up at him. That slight aura of embarrassment still present around him.

“Poi ‘o sai che n’ so ballà. Io n’ ballo.”  _ (And you know I can’t dance. I don’t dance.)  _ Aureliano added quickly, before Spadino could say anything else.

“Vabbè, ma che vor dì? Non devi sapè balla, se divertimo uguale.”  _ (What does that have to do with anything? You don’t have to know how to dance, we can still have fun.)  _ Spadino raised his gaze on him again, but quickly glanced away one more time as he went on “E poi n’è quello er punto… E’ che me piacerebbe uscì come fanno tutti…”  _ (And that’s not even the point… I’d just like to go out like everyone else does.) _

Aureliano had furrowed his eyebrows, his blue eyes welling with confusion. He had nearly replied with something stupid like  _ ‘what are you on about? We do go out’ _ , but in that moment he’d understood what Spadino’s words truly meant, and felt a sting in the center of his chest.

Having to love someone in secret was torture, but they had no other choice. They knew it right from the start. “Spadì…” Aureliano frowned.

“Lascia sta, Aurelià… ‘O so.”  _ (Leave it, Aurelià. I know.) _

Spadino pushed himself off of the bar counter and walked around it to reach the sink and busy himself with washing the cup he’d just finished using, along with a couple spoons and the moka.

Aureliano scrubbed a hand down his face and scratched at his beard. Seeing Spadino upset was something that bothered him more than anything else, after hurting him once he had promised he’d always keep him happy. Aureliano stood up to get behind the bar as well, he wrapped his arms around Spadino’s waist, hugging him from behind, and placed a soft kiss to his temple.

“Tu ‘o sai che me piacerebbe pure a me de annà in giro co’ te, sì? Come ‘na coppia normale.” ( _ You do know that I’d like to go out with you, too, just like a normal couple? _ )

Aureliano asked almost in a whisper, his breath warm against Spadino’s ear, yet the latter didn’t stop trying to rub away a particularly stubborn stain off of a cup.

“‘O so, Aurelià.”  _ (I know, Aurelià.) _ Spadino acknowledged with a nod.

It wasn’t something they could do much about. They were gangsters, the lives they led were dangerous to begin with, and they knew that not keeping their relationship a secret was going to cost them their lives. Aureliano loved Spadino with his entire heart, with every fiber of his body, and if it wouldn’t have turned into a death sentence, he’d have shouted it to the world from the top of the Colosseum.

“Oh, guardame.”  _ (Hey, look at me.)  _ Aureliano said when Spadino wouldn’t stop fumbling with water and detergent.

So Spadino finally stopped, rinsed his hands and dried them on a not too clean towel and turned to face him. A deep scowl warped his gentle features, Aureliano pursed his lips as he looked down at him.

“Ndo’ me porti stasera?”  _ (Where are you taking me tonight?)  _ Aureliano asked, a hint of a smile curving his lips.

“Ma che stai a dì?”  _ (What are you talking about?)  _ Spadino furrowed his eyebrows, completely puzzled.

“Te sto a dì che stasera uscimo. Basta fa’ finta che stamo a lavorà. Stamo attenti.”  _ (I’m telling you that we’re going out tonight. We just have to pretend we’re working. We’ll be careful.) _

Spadino didn’t say anything in response, but the way in which he beamed up at him and pulled him in for a kiss was the only answer Aureliano needed.  
  


 

*** 

  
  


Aureliano pulled the jeep into the backyard of the Faraon, the club owned by the Anacletis, while Spadino was already squirming with excitement in his seat. Aureliano could already hear that awful thumping music seeping through the walls of the club and was mentally regretting his decision to let Spadino decide where they would have spent their night out. He should have probably just taken him back to the mud springs, that would have been so much better.

“Daje, Aurelià!”  _ (C’mon, Aurelià!) _ Spadino half yelled as he quickly climbed out of the jeep and slammed the door definitely too hard.

“Che cazzo, Spadì!”  _ (For fuck’s sake, Spadì!) _ Aureliano growled at the way in which Spadino had flung the car door shut, but he really couldn’t help the fond smile spreading across his face.

He knew Spadino was happy, and it made him just as happy. He got out of the jeep himself, locked it up and shoved the keys deep into the back pocket of his jeans, before joining Spadino by the backdoor of the club.

“Sei pronto?”  _ (Are you ready?) _ Spadino asked, a grin plastered on his face.

“A fa ‘na figura de merda?”  _ (To look like a dick?) _ Aureliano asked.

“Ma falla finita!”  _ (C’mon, stop saying that!) _ Spadino laughed, then pushed the door open. He waited by the threshold, an arm bent behind his back and the other gesturing for Aureliano to go inside before him.

“Dopo de lei, re de’ i zingari.”  _ (After you, king of the gypsies.) _ Aureliano teased him with a smirk and a bow of the head.

Spadino started flailing his arms, just like he always did when dancing, then quickly spun around and took a deep bow. Aureliano’s laugh was accompanied by a shake of his head, as he watched his boyfriend enter the club.

That was the second time Aureliano had stepped inside the Faraon during business hours, the first time had been when they’d locked Friar Fuck in the basement, and even then they hadn’t really lingered on the dancefloor. He watched Spadino make his way through the crowd as he danced, the strobes and loud music making Aureliano grimace as he followed him.

Spadino came to a halt not too long after, in a more secluded corner of the venue, he beckoned Aureliano to come closer to him, and when at first he’d rolled his eyes and shook his head, Spadino laughed and started moving to the rhythm of the song playing. It wasn’t Aureliano’s favorite music genre, he either listened to hard rock or rap, but he knew that as long as Spadino could dance to a song he’d like it.

He watched him sway and spin, slap the sole of his shoe and clap his hands, and move his feet in a way and pace that had Aureliano both in wonder and hysterics. Spadino was truly something else, and he was having so much fun that it made Aureliano have fun, no matter how much he disliked being in that place.

Suddenly Spadino looked over Aureliano’s shoulder, concern painting his features as he abruptly stopped dancing. Aureliano furrowed his eyebrows and nearly turned around to see what had possibly caused that change, but Spadino caught him by the arm and started dragging him to the basement.

“So’ ‘n cretino. Non te dovevo portà qua, me conoscono tutti.”  _ (I’m an idiot. I shouldn’t have brought you here, everyone knows me.)  _ Spadino murmured as he pulled the keys of the basement out of his back pocket.

They truly shouldn’t have come there, not because Aureliano didn’t want to be in a dance club, but because it was definitely a risk.

"C'ha visto qualcuno?"  _ (Has anyone seen us?) _ Aureliano asked, an eyebrow quirking in question.

"Penso de no... Spero."  _ (I don't think so... Hopefully.) _

Aureliano watched him unlock the door to the basement, the green light and weird musty smell instantly evoked memories of being there with Lele, celebrating the small success of holding Theodosiou captive. His chest clenched just for a moment, until he heard Spadino shut and lock the door behind them.

"Potemo sta ‘n po' qua. Se qualcuno chiede je dico che c'avevo nascosto la robba e ‘a semo venuti a pijà."  _ (We can stay here for a while. If anyone asks I can say I had hidden some drugs here, and we came to pick it up.) _ Spadino nodded, but it actually sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than Aureliano.

The risk of being there had suddenly caught up with him, after the first moments of euphoria, Aureliano could tell, but now that they were there they might as well make it a moment to enjoy.

"Sì sì, vabbè."  _ (Yeah yeah, that's fine.) _ Aureliano nodded "Se famo ‘n goccetto?"  _ (Shall we take a drink?) _ he smirked, pointing at the many bottles of booze stacked pretty much everywhere around the room.

Spadino couldn't help but mirror that smirk "Daje."  _ (Hell yeah.) _

The basement was the perfect place to have their own private party in. Just like Spadino had said once, no one could hear them down there, not even if they screamed. They were quite a few feet underground, and the music of the venue was loud enough to be clearly heard all the way down there.

A couple shots of vodka in, Spadino was loudly singing along to a song that Aureliano had probably heard once in his car, and was dancing with a plastic cup in his hands. He was staring Aureliano right in his eyes as he screamed the lyrics, and when he clapped his hands he accidentally flung the cup at Aureliano, making him laugh so hard he could barely breathe.

"Quanto sei cojone, Spadì!"  _ (You're such an idiot, Spadì!) _ Aureliano laughed, and Spadino did the same as he grabbed him by both his arms to keep himself from doubling over.

Aureliano wrapped his arms around Spadino to keep him upright, his face and stomach hurting from how hard he'd been laughing. Spadino looked up at him, dark eyes shining in the dim lit room, a dopey smile curling his lips and Aureliano could help but dip his head to kiss him... But as soon as their lips met, Spadino pulled back with wide eyes, scaring the life out of Aureliano.

"Che è?!"  _ (What is it?!) _ Aureliano cried, startled.

"Aurelià, sta canzone spacca!"  _ (This song rocks, Aurelià!) _ Spadino shouted as he started jumping on the spot.

Aureliano screwed his eyes shut and sucked in a shaky breath. Spadino really was an idiot, he'd terrified him... Yet he couldn't help the laugh that had started bubbling in his chest and tore out of his throat. He shook his head, still laughing as Spadino danced, until he pressed his entire body against Aureliano's and laced their fingers together.

"Balla, Aurelià!"  _ (Dance, Aurelià!) _ Spadino beamed up at him, and this time Aureliano couldn't say no to him.

It was just the two of them in a dark, secluded room of a club's basement in Fiumicino, there was alcohol coursing through his system, and the love of his life looked like he was having a blast. He might as well enjoy the moment and stop denying himself to have just as much fun as Spadino.

Aureliano let Spadino take the lead and set the pace of the dance, he had no idea what to do or how to do it but he figured he'd just let the music flow through him and guide the way in which his body started moving against Spadino’s. It was a bit awkward at first, because he was literally just bobbing his head and swaying side to side, but then Spadino started pushing him and making him jump and twirl.

It was so liberating and fun, he did not know why he'd waited so long to actually do it... Like so many other things, before Spadino came along. Once he had started he couldn't stop, and eventually he took the lead as he ground against Spadino, smirking down at his surprised expression. Spadino then turned around, pressing his back and ass against Aureliano and rutting up and down on him. A growl left Aureliano's lips as he wrapped both arms around his boyfriend and dipped his head to latch his lips onto his creamy neck, earning a gasp and a soft moan in return.

Things were taking an interesting turn, a turn that was definitely to be expected, but that didn't make it any less interesting.

Spadino lifted an arm to hook a hand on the back of Aureliano's neck, hissing when Aureliano's tongue started trailing up his neck and his teeth caught his earlobe. Aureliano felt Spadino’s knees buck when he sucked the soft flesh inside his mouth, and could help but run both hands down Spadino’s stomach, until they found the waist of his black jeans.

They weren't dancing anymore, the thumping of the techno song was bleeding into the thundering of Aureliano's heartbeat, mixing up until the only thing he could hear were Spadino’s ragged breaths and his own pulse. After some more moments of pure teasing, Aureliano's hand found its way inside Spadino’s boxers, the cold pads of his fingers relishing the warmth of Spadino’s skin, but making Spadino shiver.

"Aurelià..." Spadino breathed out, leaning his head back against Aureliano's shoulder.

"Spadì..." Aureliano whispered as his hand stopped teasing and found that it was really going for.

Spadino moaned as soon as Aureliano thumbed at the head of his cock, still trapped inside a layer of cotton and one of denim. Aureliano may have been shy about having sex with him the first couple times, but now he basked in how glorious it was to pleasure his partner. He loved touching him, savoring his skin, tasting him, smelling him, it was more intoxicating than any drug he'd ever sold.

Aureliano kept rubbing him in circles, until Spadino was writhing against him for more, and that was when he began to stroke him, while his free hand traveled up to push two fingers inside Spadino’s mouth. He felt his own cock stir in his pants while Spadino moaned around his fingers, and he pressed them flat against his tongue as he pumped him faster.

Aureliano listened to the sounds he was eliciting from the man he loved and grinned, thinking about how much he enjoyed making love to him, and how much he enjoyed spiting his late father by loving another man. Tullio would have been beyond furious, and Aureliano had always taken great pleasure in making him mad.

"Viè qua, Spadì..."  _ (Come here, Spadì...) _ Aureliano said as he spun his boyfriend around, he wished he could see the beautiful blush that he knew was probably tinting his pale skin, but the green light prevented it.

Spadino's shiny eyes looked confused, but Aureliano lifted him to sit on top of one of the counters and unceremoniously tugged his jeans all the way down to his ankles while he kissed the air out of his lungs. Spadino sounded like he'd been craving that kiss even more than Aureliano's hands between his legs, as he threw his arms around his neck.

Aureliano kissed him hard and deep, his right hand going back to finding Spadino’s cock and giving it the attentions it needed, while he swallowed his moans. Aureliano broke the kiss as suddenly as he had started it, only to sink to his knees between Spadino's legs.

"Dio, Aurelià..."  _ (God, Aurelià...) _ Spadino shuddered in anticipation, grabbing onto the edge of the table so hard his knuckles turned white.

"Va bene pure si me chiami solo Aureliano..."  _ (It's alright if you only call me Aureliano...) _ he smirked, unable to resist making the most idiotic and unfunny joke.

"Ma statte zitto, va'!"  _ (Just shut up!) _ Spadino laughed at the lame joke, and Aureliano's wolfish grin made him shudder.

"Basta chiede."  _ (Just gotta ask.) _

And with that Aureliano wrapped a hand around the base of Spadino’s cock and took the rest of it into his mouth. Spadino's right hand flew immediately to fist at the short hair on top of Aureliano's head, and a long string of Sinti curses left his throat as Aureliano sucked the soul out of him.

Moans, curses and even Spadino accidentally banging the back of his head into the wall were the only music Aureliano wanted to hear. He felt Spadino’s hips stutter as he got close to his completion, and that was when Aureliano increased the pace, hooking his arms underneath Spadino’s thighs to pull him closer and swallowing him almost all the way down.

"Cazzo, Aurelià!"  _ (Fuck, Aurelià!) _ Spadino half shouted, yanking Aureliano's hair back and lifting his head and gaze on him in the process.

Aureliano's liquid blue eyes focused on Spadino’s slacked jaw and twisted features, his cock sliding all the way out of Aureliano's mouth. He panted against the wet flesh as he stared up at him, then twirled his tongue around the head without breaking eye contact. Spadino’s nostrils flared, his teeth ground together, and Aureliano's eyelids fluttered shut as he went back down on him, to finish what he had started.

It didn't take long, just a few more bobs of his head and Spadino came with a long groan and a full body shudder that made him fall back against the wall, left hand pressed against the dusty wood and right hand digging into Aureliano's skull.

Spitters are quitters, and Aureliano had learned to enjoy every single aspect of sex with Spadino, so he swallowed what was in his mouth and wiped his lips and beard into the sleeve of his shirt.

"Viè qua..."  _ (C'mhere...) _ Spadino sighed, fingers bunching up the fabric of Aureliano's shirt over the shoulders in an attempt to pull him up.

There was a sated smile curling his lips and Aureliano felt his stomach churn with happiness, a smile stretched across his own face as he surged back to his feet to let Spadino pull him in for a sloppy kiss.

"Mo ce penso io a te..."  _ (I got you...) _ Spadino half slurred against his lips, hand skimming over his clothed, toned stomach until his fingers hooked into his belt.

"No qua, annamosene a casa."  _ (Not here, let's go home.) _ Aureliano shook his head and caught Spadino’s wrist gently.

Spadino’s eyebrows furrowed, and he tilted his head in bewilderment.

"Ma-"  _ (But-) _

Aureliano kissed him again, then shook his head.

"Sta serata era la tua... A me ce pensi quanno stamo a casa. Volevo vedette soride tutta la sera, me basta questo."  _ (This was your night... You'll think about me when we'll be home. I just wanted to see you smile all night long, that’s enough for me.) _

Spadino shook his head but didn’t say anything, his smile growing back on his lips as he cupped Aureliano's jaw. He rubbed his thumb across Aureliano's lips, caressed his bearded cheek and leaned in to press a soft kiss to his mouth.

"Nadia stanotte è meglio se se mette i tappi."  _ (Nadia better wear earplugs, tonight.) _ Spadino’s smile morphed into an evil grin, and Aureliano bursted into a loud cackle.

"Daje annamosene, sta musica me sta a rincojonì."  _ (C'mon, let's go, this music is driving me insane.) _ Aureliano said as he pulled back and collected the jacket he had previously discarded when they had started dancing.

"Mamma mia, quanto sei delicato."  _ (Gee, you're so fragile.) _ Spadino teased as he pushed himself off the counter and pulled his clothes back on.

"Te faccio vedè io, quanto so' delicato."  _ (I'll show you fragile.) _ Aureliano playfully growled as he stepped in to squeeze Spadino’s ass, making him laugh.

“Te devo portà a ballà più spesso.” ( _ I should take you out to dance more often.) _ Spadino smirked.

“Eh, vè?”  _ (I know, Right?)  _ Aureliano shook his head as he chuckled.

He felt his own hardness press against the restraining zipper of his jeans, but he knew he could wait. He nearly laughed at himself, because he never thought he could love someone enough to only cater to their needs, instead of his own. Not that he hadn’t enjoyed pleasuring Spadino, he could have spent himself in his own jeans only by feeling, hearing and watching him come in his mouth.

Damn, he  _ had _ changed.

He watched as Spadino smoothed over his clothes and fixed his jewelry with a content smile still plastered on his lips. It wasn’t a joke, he really could feel happiness warming his chest just by looking at Spadino doing literally anything, even just breathing.

His mind strayed for a moment, he thought about Livia and what she would have said. She was possessive and jealous over her baby brother, but he knew that after the first period of being mad at him for not just being with a boy, but with an Anacleti boy… Aureliano thought that she would have understood, and she would have been happy for him. Or at least, he wanted to hope she would have.

“Amò?”  _ (Babe?) _

Spadino’s voice shook him back to his senses, the pet name making his chest flutter.

“Eh?” Aureliano raised his eyebrows as he looked at him.

“‘Nnamo?”  _ (We going?) _ Spadino asked with a cocked eyebrow.

“Sì, sì. ‘Nnamo.”  _ (Yeah, yeah. We’re going.) _ Aureliano smiled softly at him, and stepped out of the basement right after Spadino.

He followed him upstairs, struggling against the instinct to hold his hand as they pushed past the crowd and into the backyard. Maybe he couldn’t let the world know how much he loved Spadino, but he was going to make sure Spadino knew it every day.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope the dialogues weren't a pain in the ass to read, but I couldn't just let them speak English throughout this entire story, it would have robbed them of their essence!


End file.
